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Volume 1 Text ¡¾002¡¿Then

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    "You must pay attention to controlling your emotions." In the past year, I have become very manic for no reason. The above sentence is a warning given to me by a psychiatrist.  Although I always felt that the doctor was not very good, and I could find what he said on the Internet, I still couldn't help but think of his advice sometimes.  I used the simplest method of deep breathing to control my emotions, and tried not to care about whether I could buy the bottom of the beautiful girl in black stockings opposite me.  I felt that since I had put on my glasses, it would be a pity not to continue watching, so after observing her lower body, I started to observe her upper body.  Her upper body is far less lethal than her lower body. Her breasts, which are between B-cup and C-cup, are not too eye-catching. On the contrary, her face gives me a feeling of d¨¦j¨¤ vu.  When it comes to her appearance, I speak from experience.  When I was coding, in order to create the image of a heroine, I worked hard on words and composed many verses, such as "I want to compare West Lake to Xizi". I spent thousands of words, and readers couldn't imagine what the heroine looked like.  When encountering a hot-tempered uncle-like reader, they will directly greet my mother and scold me for making up my words.  Later I found out that there is a trouble-free way, which can be done in one sentence, that is, go straight to the topic and say who the girl looks like. For example, if she looks like Maggie Cheung or Fan Bingbing, others can imagine what the girl looks like at a glance.  Now I might as well be blunt, the person in front of me looks and looks more like the person who shouted cheers to Mengmeng.  The more I look at her, the more I feel that this girl has a story, but I am not sure whether this feeling comes from my judgment or purely from my almost obscene imagination.  The most ridiculous thing is that the feeling of d¨¦j¨¤ vu is getting stronger and stronger. The more I look at her, the more familiar she feels.  After having this feeling, I felt even more confused.  My friend Lei Zi once looked down upon me like this: "Come on, every time you meet a beautiful woman, you always say she looks familiar!" Because of this sentence, I am not sure whether the woman in front of me is really familiar or fake.  The above is where my psychological problems lie.  Today I lack enough judgment and seem to lack enough self-confidence.  Every time this happens, I become very confused, so confused that I want to find a warm chest to rely on.  But when a warm breast was right in front of me, and even my legs were spread out in front of me, I didn't have the guts to realize what I wanted.  I can predict what will happen next. If nothing happens, I will seize the time to glance at her a few more times. After that, she will take her Yangguan Road and I will cross my single-plank bridge.  I won't know her depth, and she won't know mine.  Until one day, I could no longer remember her face.  One day in the future, I will brag to my friends like this: One day I met a girl who looked like Sister Zhiling at the airport. She opened her legs and I didn¡¯t see clearly what kind of underwear she was wearing, and then  ¡­ And then, and then there is no more.  There are some things we need to stop here, and sometimes we need to break them down next time.  There is no next chapter for a story that ends here, which is more or less a pity.  ??In fact, there could have been a possibility, but it was just because we missed the opportunity at that time that there was no possibility.  When I was very young, I almost paranoidly believed that there was a "then" in life, and I had created miracles.  After entering the marriage hall, I no longer believe in what will happen next, and life becomes more and more miserable.  At this point, I have to mention the psychiatrist again. I spent a course of treatment with him, but it had no effect at all. When I left, he finally said something like a human being: "If you feel that life is too ordinary, you might as well make a  Some changes.¡± On this day this month, I decided to make a change.  Before this, even I didn¡¯t know what kind of changes I would make.  When I was a teenager, I disliked my father very much, so I told myself that I must not do the things he did.  If I don't want to be like him when I grow up, then I have to be different from him in everything I do.  The situation is very similar now, I just need to behave differently from the person I have been in recent years.  What will happen to me in the past few years?  There is no doubt that he will pass the woman across from him.  Then, what I have to do next is not to miss her.  When I stood up, I realized that the change was actually very simple.  In the past, when I met a beautiful girl on the road, the shadow of my wife and children would flash through my mind, and then I would shake my head and smile to myself, secretly feeling that I was already married.  But now it's different. I'm a happy single. Even if you ignore the word happy, I'm still a single.    "I am as free as the wind, just like your gentleness cannot be retained" Human thinking is indeed thousands of times faster than action. When I took the first step, Xu Wei's song came into my mind.  This song inspired me so much and I really felt like I was as free as the wind.  "Everything is difficult at the beginning," this is a wise saying.  Everything in the world is difficult only in the first step. As long as you take the first step, the following things are actually much easier than you think.  Even if you don¡¯t wear Li Ning, you can make changes happen.  I walked over and stood in front of her and patted her shoulder.  At this moment, I admire myself a little, and feel that I have inspired countless women.  She woke up and looked at me confusedly.  It¡¯s time to take another first step, and I will speak the first words to her.  I was still a little nervous, so I said bravely, "You're gone." She was stunned for a few seconds and quickly clamped her legs together.  After a few more seconds, she seemed to have recovered, her expression was rather awkward, and she said two words to me: "Thank you." She gave me an unexpected surprise as soon as she opened her mouth. Let me talk about the surprise first. In fact, her voice was very cute.  The difference is too far, it's more like Ao-sensei's voice, and I prefer the latter.  As for the accident, I'm not afraid to tell you the truth. Before this, I had imagined thousands of lines she would say to me, and I was even mentally prepared for her to call me a gangster, but I didn't expect her to actually say thank you to me.  At this moment, my outlook on life was impacted to a certain extent.  It turns out that after looking at a woman¡¯s skirt, she will say thank you to you.  You see, this is "then".  ¡°At least I¡¯ll have a few more words to talk about next time I brag to my friends.  When the time comes, my friend will definitely ask me: Do I need to call her?  If he gets a positive answer, he will ask again: Have you got started?  At this time, I could just laugh and say nothing and let those guys guess hard.  My thoughts stop here, what happens next is so counterintuitive.  She first raised her head and looked at me, and then stood up and looked at me.  I have long experienced the capriciousness of women, and now I have only experienced this capriciousness again and again.  A woman who bowed her head and shyly said thank you one second, stood up and stared at you like a wolf the next second, will always make people feel that she lacks a little sense of security.  The more she looked at me, the more excited she became, and she said something incomprehensible: "I didn't expect that the famous Nine of Spades would become like this. If the intelligence hadn't been reliable, I would have thought I had found the wrong person." I didn't interrupt, because  I had no idea what she was talking about.  "Sit down, standing is too annoying." She took the lead to sit down, and I also sat next to her by accident. She turned to look at me, as if a young couple were talking to each other, and came over and said in my ear:  "Stop showing off your acting skills in front of me. You and I both know the basics, so there's no need to beat around the bush. Tell me, have you found that thing this time?"
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