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Volume 1 Chapter 7 The True and False Bull Demon King

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    I still remember the spring many years ago. At that time, I hadn¡¯t cut off my long hair, I didn¡¯t have a credit card, and I didn¡¯t have her. I only had big pants that I wore 24 hours a day But I was so happy at that time, even though I didn¡¯t have a broken acoustic guitar.  , I can only eat with Lao Ganma, but as a cute young lady, my youth was so simple and unpretentious.  However, people all go from being young and ignorant to being tortured by society into scheming lunatics.  I can't imagine how the innocent me in the beginning turned into such a perverted and corrupt person with an uncertain future.  However, I thought that laughter was no longer pure and crying was no longer complete, but that I had grown up.  I am very happy for my change. It is like something in an adult store. Although you will feel embarrassed when you buy it, at least it means you are an adult.  However, after I met Liu Laoqi, I felt like a child again. I cried so thoroughly, so obsessed and so unrestrained.  I even got back that moist feeling I had when I wet the bed.  Sadako!  The world-famous female ghost, the female killer who occupies the TV set and seizes people¡¯s last entertainment machine!  Bull Demon King!  The great sage of the demon clan who is the brother-in-law of Sun Wukong!  They are going to meet up in my small house of less than 14 square meters today. They kill people without blinking an eye, they eat people without dipping in sauce, and they all live in the same nest as Liu Laoqi, a snake and rat, and Liu Laoqi is actually the younger brother of the Jade Emperor. When I finally learned the truth, I shed tears~~~~ I really wanted to sleep with my head covered. When I woke up, I was still a small employee in a pet store. The only way to entertain myself every day was to watch our beautiful boss push out her breasts. Walking with my butt raised, riding my Phoenix permanent bicycle to and from get off work, whistling at the little girls passing by However, there was no chance for anything.  When we grow up, we always need to accept knowledge from four aspects: parents, teachers, books, and society.  However, the interesting thing is that the last one always likes to be the opposite of the first three.  Teachers, parents, and textbooks spent more than ten years molding me into an atheist, but Liu Laoqi destroyed it all with just his wretched old face.  Beautiful things in the world will always be destroyed by bad things, which is why it is such an infuriating thing for a virgin to have her virginity taken away.  That night, Sadako and I looked at each other from a distance across a TV screen. I said tremblingly: "The Bull Demon King will come tomorrow." Sadako hummed: "What does he do?" I thought about it.  : "A professional murderer, he used to form an armed organization with Sun Wukong. It is very dangerous anyway." Sadako said: "Liu Xianren wants me to help you deal with the danger. If you have any difficulties, I will face it with you.  ¡± I felt a little touched in my heart. As long as Sadako doesn¡¯t crawl out of the TV, I think she is still a good girl.  ???????????????????????????????????????????????  As long as the Bull Demon King doesn't eat me, everything will be fine.  This colorful world cannot mess up his mind, at least it can fascinate his eyes. When the time comes, I will take him around and get him some delicious food to eat. Maybe he will treat me as a good friend.  Give me an elixir or something when the time comes, and my brother Xiao Qiang will become an immortal immediately.  Of course, you can think that I am greedy and wishful thinking, but what I want to say is that these two are precisely the most primitive driving forces for human progress. Otherwise, why would the electric fan and refrigerator be invented?  Not just for laziness!  But I know that I can¡¯t treat the Bull Demon King to something too expensive. In case the Bull Demon King is more loyal, he shakes his body after eating and shakes out a bunch of little monsters: "These are the five hundred cow lice on my body. You  Treat them to a meal too. "Then I'll be broke.  Before going to the train station, I asked Wang Erleng from next door to borrow his old jeep and drove all the way to the train station.  Wang Er was stunned that this Jeep had been hit once before and the roof was a bit flat, so he simply sawed off the roof and turned it into a convertible.  One time, he took his girl out for a ride in a car. It happened to be a rainy day, and a full load of water was filled into the car. The passers-by looked at him in surprise: "Hey, this grandson opened the swimming pool."  From then on, Wang Erling never tired of it, taking the girls out for drives on rainy days and taking a mandarin duck bath every time.  I worked really hard for the Bull Demon King. Before I went home in the evening, I bought a book called "Western Games" to study the situation of the Bull Demon King. When I got the book, I couldn't help but secretly rejoice. Fortunately, this  It¡¯s not Voldemort from Harry Potter who¡¯s coming back, otherwise I¡¯d have to buy seven books at once.  However, there are not many records about the Bull Demon King in the original text of "Western Game". I originally thought of following his fancy and giving him a meeting gift to increase his favorability, but there was only one sentence about "Old Cow Eating Young Grass"  Other than that, I really can¡¯t think of anything else.  After all, he is also a demon king. Even if I can get something, he may not be able to do it.Well worth it.  There are two types of men who are not greedy in the world, one is a fool, and the other is a saint; the former is indifferent, and the latter wants nothing.  In this life, the Bull Demon King has killed people and rebelled; he has sworn brothers and taken care of Xiaomi.  Most successful people, even if they are not saints, are certainly not interested in things that people like me can master.  At 12 o¡¯clock at noon, I stood outside the train station. It was so hot that there were no ticket sellers at all. This shows how high the temperature is today.  My car didn't even have a roof, so I had to get under the chassis to enjoy the cool air.  According to China's national conditions, the twelve o'clock train will not arrive before two o'clock.  The reason why I came so early was just to make preparations.  Because I don¡¯t know what form the Bull Demon King will appear in. If he appears with two horns on his head and a copper ring on his nose, and is taken home by some World of Warcraft player as a tauren, I will be in trouble.  I looked around and paid careful attention to the surrounding environment. I secretly set an escape path in my heart, and then thought of countermeasures: Well, the Bull Demon King is here. I will treat him to an ice cream first. This is hot.  God, he must be very happy after eating, there is no need to eat me Just as I was thinking this, suddenly a large group of people came out of the train station, and I quickly got out from under the car.  At this time, a burly man in the crowd caught my eye. He was tall and strong, with a square mouth and broad nose, a charred face, and big set teeth. He walked with a lively look.  This must be the Bull Demon King. I am filled with joy. The old cow really knows how to do things. He has become so vivid and eye-catching. But where did his suit come from?  I didn't have time to think about it, so I stepped forward to stop him and whispered, "Is it the Bull Demon King?" The Bull Demon King was stunned for a moment: "Ni (you) Ni Shisleeping (who are you), how do you know me?  ? This is my first time coming to Zui'er (here). " I was confused, why does Niu Mo Wang smell like Shaanxi and not Qin Shihuang?  I still had a respectful expression on my face: "Master Bull Demon King, I was sent by Liu Laoqi to pick you up. Please stay with me for a while. If you have any orders, just tell me that you just want to  Even if you eat tender grass, I can plant it for you now.¡± The Bull Demon King looked puzzled: ¡°Nishishusue (who are you), is there something wrong?¡± I looked puzzled; ¡°You are not "Journey to the West".  "The Bull Demon King? The one who was sworn to Sun Wukong." The big man laughed loudly: "You're stupid, I'm the Niu Mo King of Shaanxi Li, the boss of Beef Jia Mo Li.  ." Me: "" The big man laughed and walked past me: "Why does someone know me here? It turns out that I am a stupid boy.  She (said), Niu Mo Wang is my registered trademark, and any counterfeiting will be investigated." I looked at the big man walking away with a black line on my head, and I was extremely depressed. You, a seller of beef buns, look so impressive.  What to do?  I huddled in the little shade of the broken jeep and thought for a long time. I could only go to the nearby canteen to buy something. Then I borrowed a piece of paper and pen and wrote a sign saying "Pick up the Bull Demon King".  I don¡¯t know if the Bull Demon King knows our words here, but that¡¯s all.  Not long after I held up the sign, a big man over two meters tall walked out of the station, with broad shoulders and round waist, eyes like bells, and a standard Chinese character face, striding over.  I recognized it immediately, this time it must be the Bull Demon King, because he was still wearing ancient clothes, a shiny chainmail and a cloak, just like the Monkey King in the TV series "Journey to the West" when he borrowed a banana fan.  The trick that confuses the water-avoiding golden-eyed beast.  Although the face has turned into a human face, the clothes have not changed. Not only me, many people have noticed him.  What was different from what I imagined was that the Bull Demon King was holding a woman in his hand. The woman was also dressed in ancient costume. She was extremely beautiful, but her face was a little frosty.  In the woman's arms was a child, about five or six years old.  This combination was a bit like the Mountain King leading Mrs. Yazhai out. I felt uneasy because I didn¡¯t know who those two were, so I could only step forward quickly and tremblingly said: "Niu Niu Niu Niu Demon King, hello! I  Liu Laoqi sent you to pick you up." The Bull Demon King glanced at me and laughed heartily: "Haha, don't be so polite. You call me like an Internet writer. You don't have to be afraid. I'm coming to the human world this time.  "Hey, thanks to the help of the gods in the Heavenly Palace, I won't hurt you." A big stone fell to my heart: "Ox Demon King, you are so kind." "Hey, don't worry, if you don't mind.  If so, please call me Brother Niu. I¡¯m several thousand years older than you. I won¡¯t treat you badly by calling me Brother, right?¡± The Bull Demon King waved his hand and said to me.  "I won't treat you badly, I won't treat you unfairly! Hello, Brother Niu!" Okay!  Who is the Bull Demon King?  Great Sage Pingtian, even Great Sage Qitian??Sun Wukong has to call me big brother, but he actually calls me brother.  It seems that I will have to get a title in the future. I have decided that it will be called the Great Sage Caotian.  With every morning erection, I can rape the entire sky.  With my heart racing, I looked at the woman next to the Bull Demon King and said, "This is" "This is my wife and child." I was shocked: Princess Iron Fan and Red Boy?  What the hell!  The Iron Fan Princess was fanning herself with a small fan in her hand, probably because of the hot weather. From the looks of it, it was probably a banana fan.  If she turned around and slapped her fan, the entire train station would be gone, and foreign newspapers would once again hype up "China's secret testing of nuclear weapons in XX area."  I quickly and respectfully said to Princess Iron Fan: "Hello, Mrs. Niu!" Princess Iron Fan snorted coldly and glanced at me. I instantly felt like a piece of toilet paper soaked in urine, being seen through easily.  .  I was really afraid that she would pinch my arm and say, "When you were looking at the stars, you called me Xiao Tiantian, but now you call me Mrs. Niu. You are so heartless" Fortunately, this situation did not happen!  I turned around and shouted "Holy Infant King" to Red Boy, who was only five or six years old. Red Boy's comment on me was: "You know a lot as a little brat, but those were all mistakes I made when I was young."  It¡¯s my mistake, don¡¯t mention it, I am a good boy now.¡± Me: ¡°¡­¡±
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